Archive for the Monstrous Question Category

CKF Monstrous Question: MONSTER MOVIE MUSICALS (Part 3 of 3)

Posted in 2012, LL Soares Reviews, Mad Doctors!, Mark Onspaugh Columns, Monsters, Monstrous Question, Musicals with tags , , , , , , on August 19, 2012 by knifefighter

CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT
MONSTROUS QUESTION:  Monster Movie Musicals
With Michael Arruda, Nick Cato, Paul McMahon, and Mark Onspaugh
Part 3 of 3

 

LA LA LA

MICHAEL ARRUDA:  And now here is our final answer to this month’s MONSTROUS QUESTION: Which horror or sci-fi movie would you like turned into a musical?

****

MARK ONSPAUGH:  Here’s mine:

“THE MAD MUSICAL”

Music by Bernard Herrmann & Howard Shore

Lyrics by Forrest J. Ackerman & Sir Elton John

At the annual meeting of the Society of Mad Scientists and Doctors, chaos and hilarity ensue when several doctors collaborate on building Eliza (the “perfect” girl) and they all fall for her, to the chagrin of their creations and hunchbacked assistants.

The big, lavish and deranged production that will have you tapping your misshapen appendages to these hit numbers:

Andre Delambre sings “If I Were a Fly on the Wall” and “Kiss Me, Don’t Swat Me”

Andre Delambre sings “If I Were a Fly on the Wall.”

Victor Frankenstein sings “He’s Got Her Heart, but I’ve Got Her Pancreas”

Teenage Frankenstein & Werewolf sing “Pubescent and Present” and “A-C-N-E”

Anton Phibes & Peyton Westlake sing “I Like Your Face” and “Ow, Ow, Ow”

Dr. Phibes accompanies the singers on the organ.

Alexander Thorkel sings “Call Me ‘Mister Big'” and “Got a Big Crush on My Little Girl”

Fritz, Igor and Renfield sing “I Got a Hunch He’s Falling in Love” and “Yes, Master”

Eliza sings “Parts of Me Love Him, Parts of Me Love Someone Else” and “(Screams)”

Gerald Deemer & Andre Delambre sing “Web of Lies” and “She Says Two Legs is Enough”

Victor Frankenstein sings “He’s Got Her Heart, but I’ve Got Her Pancreas.”

The entire company sings, “Got Me in Stitches,” “My Love Went to Pieces at the Buffet,”  “Candlelight, Good – Torch Light, Bad” and “I Can’t Stay Mad Playing Doctor with You”

Held over, one week at Big Boy Dinner Theater in Oxide, Nevada and Stuckey’s Roadside Praline Emporium and Theater-in-the-Swamp in Mustyodor, Georgia

*****

 MICHAEL ARRUDA:  There you have it.  Thanks everyone for joining us for this month’s MONSTROUS QUESTION.  We’ll see you next time, here at CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT!

 

—-END PART 3—

Answer © Copyright 2012 by Mark Onspaugh

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CKF Monstrous Question: MONSTER MOVIE MUSICALS (Part 2 of 3)

Posted in 2012, Monstrous Question, Musicals, Paul McMahon Columns with tags , , , , on August 18, 2012 by knifefighter

CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT
MONSTROUS QUESTION:  Monster Movie Musicals
With Michael Arruda, Nick Cato, Paul McMahon, and Mark Onspaugh
Part 2 of 3

“Doe, a deer, a female deer. Ray, a pocket full of sun!”

MICHAEL ARRUDA:  We continue with another answer to this month’s Monstrous Question:  Which horror or sci-fi movie would you like turned into a musical? 

PAUL MCMAHON: I wrote a treatment for an entire musical.  I may have taken this too far.

ARRUDA:  Nah!  Go for it!

PAUL MCMAHON:  Okay, here goes!

“Get on stage! It’s time for your song!”

“THE ISLAND OF DR. MOREAU”

A full-blown major Broadway Musical, featuring the same makeup technology that made CATS such a financial success!

Summary/ Musical Numbers

ACT I, Scene 1

-In darkness, a voice-over calls an SOS, the Lady Vain is going down. Curtains open on Edward Prendick, who is rescued in a lifeboat and believed dead, but is revived.

Prendick Lives!…..Performers:Prendick, Montgomery and M’ling

-Noise from Montgomery’s cages are driving the sailors mad. When Prendick interferes on Montgomery’s behalf, he is cast out with Montgomery at The Island of Screams

Begone, You Beast…..Performers: Ship’s Captain, Montgomery, Prendick, M’ling and Men’s Ensemble

-Montgomery tells Prendick of the island as they approach the compound. In the forest, strange hidden things watch them.

The Brilliant Dr. Moreau….. Performers: Montgomery and Prendick

-In the laboratory, Dr. Moreau experiments on a puma.

What Makes A Man?…..Performed by Dr. Moreau

-Prendick, alerted by the creature’s cries, flees into the forest and discovers a group of hog-like people. He runs and is chased by something he can’t see.

Monsters, Creatures, Inhuman Beasts!….. Performed by Prendick

-Back at the compound, Prendick questions Montgomery who deflects and avoids all questions, being half drunk.

What Is This Place?….. Performers: Prendick and Montgomery

ACT I, Scene 2

The next morning.

– Prendick enters the laboratory and discovers Puma-Man, covered in bandages. He offers water, but Moreau appears, slapping the cup away and calling for Montgomery.

Can I Help You?….. Prendick, Puma-Man, Moreau

-Prendick believes Moreau is turning humans into animals and vows not to be next.

It Will Never Be Me….. Prendick

-Prendick is captured by men who resemble animals. They inform him of the island’s laws, which includes a daily worship of Moreau.

The Law….. Sayer of the Law, Ape-Man, Hyena-Man, Animal Ensemble

-Moreau arrives and Prendick escapes. Prendick decides to drown himself, but is interrupted by Moreau, who explains that the creatures used to be animals and assures him that the pain he inflicts is insignificant to the final outcome.

Not The Man You Think Me….. Prendick, Moreau, Animal Ensemble

**There will be a fifteen minute intermission.**

 

The Sayer of the Law also likes to sing a few tunes!

ACT II, SCENE 1

A week later

-Montgomery and Prendick discover a half-eaten rabbit, which breaks The Law. They alert Moreau, who calls an assembly and accuses Leopard-Man, who flees.

The Law Is Broken….. Performers: Montgomery, Moreau, Sayer of the Law, Leopard-Man and Animal Ensemble

-Prendick corners the Leopard-Man, who insists Moreau will perform more agonizing experiments on him. With Moreau closing in, Leopard-Man attacks and Prendick shoots him dead. With his last breath, Leopard-Man thanks him.

Not The Man You Think Him….. Performers: Prendick, Leopard-Man, Moreau and Montgomery

-Prendick confides to Montgomery’s manservant, M’ling, his belief that Leopard-Man acted with Hyena-Man, who chased him through the forest his first week. Moreau overhears and dismisses Prendick’s ideas, calling him a fool.

He Did Not Act Alone….. Performers: Prendick, M’ling and Moreau

ACT II, Scene 2

A week later

-In the lab the mostly finished Puma-Man escapes and is chased through the forest by Moreau. Prendick arrives in time to witness as the two kill each other.

Dr. Moreau practices for his big singing debut!

I Gave You Everything/ You Gave Me Nothing….. Performers: Moreau, Puma-Man and Prendick

-Prendick tries to convince Montgomery to leave the island, but the beasts attack, led by Hyena-Man. Montgomery appeases them by giving over his whiskey, but they kill him anyway. Prendick escapes, knocking over a lamp that sets the compound ablaze.

The Law Is Dead….. Performers: Prendick, Montgomery, M’ling, Sayer of the Law, Hyena-Man, and Animal Ensemble

-In the aftermath of the fire, Prendick learns Montgomery has destroyed every boat and radio on the island. He discovers a frightened M’ling following him to warn him that the animals are coming. M’ling kills Hyena-Man and is mortally wounded.

Am I The Man I Think Me?….. Performers: Prendick, M’ling, Hyena-Man and Animal Ensemble

ACT II, Scene 3

A week later

-Prendick survives in a lean-to on the beach. Animals approach and retreat, returning to their natural state. A boat drifts ashore with two bodies in it, one of them the Ship Captain that marooned him in Act I Scene 1. He waves to the animals along the shore as he leaves, and only M’ling waves back.

What Luck, What Fortune…..Performed by Prendick

-Prendick, back in London, tells his story and is laughed at and scorned. He feigns amnesia to keep from being committed, and vows seclusion for the rest of his life.

What Makes A Man? (reprise)….. Performers: Prendick and  Human Ensemble

CURTAIN

*****

MICHAEL ARRUDA:  Thanks, Paul, for that very detailed treatment.  Join us next time for Part 3, the final installment to this month’s MONSTROUS QUESTION, when MARK ONSPAUGH gives his take on the monster movie musical!

 —END Part 2—

 Answer © Copyright 2012 by Paul McMahon

CKF Monstrous Question: MONSTER MOVIE MUSICALS! (Part 1 of 3)

Posted in 2012, Michael Arruda Reviews, Monsters, Monstrous Question, Musicals, Nick Cato Reviews with tags , , , , , , on August 17, 2012 by knifefighter

CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT
MONSTROUS QUESTION:  Monster Movie Musicals
With Michael Arruda, Nick Cato, Paul McMahon, and Mark Onspaugh
PART 1 OF 3

Figaro! Figaro!

MICHAEL ARRUDA:   Welcome everyone to this month’s MONSTROUS QUESTION column.  This month’s question comes courtesy of Mark Onspaugh.

Take it away, Mark.

MARK: Thanks, Michael.  I just saw that Paul Williams is clean and sober and back to making music (I had thought he was dead) —anyway, you may remember he was behind the music of Brian de Palma’s great riff on PHANTOM OF THE OPERA, PHANTOM OF THE PARADISE (1974).

I thought it might be fun for people to pick horror or sci-fi movies to be turned into musicals, maybe name a song or two and (if they want) performers and/or composer/lyricist.

MICHAEL ARRUDA:  So, there you have it.  Today’s Monstrous Question:  Which horror or sci-fi movie would you like turned into a musical?

NICK CATO:  Perhaps to alleviate some tension and add even more controversy, the forthcoming THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE 3: FINAL SEQUENCE should add some musical numbers, including updated versions of ‘STUCK ON YOU’ from the now defunct Seattle punk band The Briefs, ‘RIP IT OUT’ by Ace Frehley, and the conga-line classic ‘HOT HOT HOT’ by Buster Poindexter.

Singing in the shower with the HUMAN CENTIPEDE!

*****

MICHAEL ARRUDA:  I’m going with three classics.

First, John Carpenter’s HALLOWEEN (1978).  It would feature the following songs:

-“My Sister Just Bopped Her Boyfriend For the Last Time”

-“The Boogeyman Boogie.”

-“Stroke Me Laurie Strode”

-“Is There A Man Behind that Mask?”

-“Let’s Do What We’re Not Supposed To Do (The Babysitters’ Ballad)”

More singing in the shower – this time with NORMAN BATES!

Alfred Hitchcok’s PSYCHO (1960),and believe it or not, the musical version would be darker than the movie!  Here are some of the songs:

-Who’s That Lurking Outside My Shower Curtain?

-A Boy’s Best Friend Is His Mother (a love song)

-Am I a Man or a Mother?

-I’ll Carry You to Any Fruit Cellar

-Blood, Mother, Blood!

-Gotta Clean This Shower: The Body Wrap Rap

“I’m so nervous about signing for the first time!”

And last but not least, the original FRANKENSTEIN (1931).

Featuring such show stoppers as Henry Frankenstein’s:

It’s Alive!

-Now I Know What It Feels Like to be God!

-Put That Torch Away Fritz Before the Monster Grabs You

Fritz solos such as:

-Don’t Blame Me for Grabbing the Wrong Brain I Can’t Read!

&

-No One Ever Told Me Abnormal Was Bad

Songs by the Monster, including:

-Little Girl, Why Are You Crying?

-Why Is Everybody Always Screaming At Me?

-Invite Me to the Wedding – I’d Like to Kill the Bride

And other soon to be classics like:

-My Little Maria’s Dead, and Someone’s Gonna Pay!

-Waltzing to the Windmill

And the mega-dance number,

-Don’t Do It Fritz, Don’t Drop that Jar!

Join us next time for more answers to the Monstrous Question, and you won’t want to miss it, as Paul McMahon writes an entire treatment to a musical based on THE ISLAND OF DR. MOREAU!

—END PART 1

Answers © Copyright 2012 by Michael Arruda and Nick Cato

Monstrous Question: BEST HORROR MOVIE MAKE-UP (Part 4 of 4)

Posted in 2012, Frankenstein Movies, Horror Movie Makeup, LL Soares Reviews, Monsters, Monstrous Question, Planet of the Apes, Roger Corman with tags , , , , , , on April 20, 2012 by knifefighter

CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT:  MONSTROUS QUESTION
Question by Michael Arruda
Featuring Michael Arruda,Dan Keohane, Mark Onspaugh and L.L. Soares
Part 4 of 4

Today’s MONSTROUS QUESTION:  What are your picks for the most memorable make-up jobs in a horror/monster movie?

##

L.L. SOARES responds:

It’s funny what kind of things leave their imprint on you when you’re growing up. It’s not that you can’t tell the difference between quality work and dreck when you’re young, but you are much more accepting of the bad stuff, because you can at least see the imagination that went behind it.

Growing up, Jack Pierce was one of my heroes. As an avid fan of old horror movies, especially the Universal classics, it was hard not to appreciate the fine work of the master. This was the man who single-handedly stamped the image of the FRANKENSTEIN Monster on our brains (in Mary Shelley’s book, he is quite different, but the 1931 film is where we get our visual for him). Pierce also did the make-up for DRACULA (1931), turning Bela Lugosi into the ultimate creature of the night,  THE MUMMY  – both Boris Karloff’s Imhotep (1932) and Kharis, played by Tom Tyler in THE MUMMY’S HAND (1940) and the great Lon Chaney, Jr. in the rest of the Kharis film series from 1942 – 1944.

Jack Pierce's FRANKENSTEIN Monster is the gold standard for horror movie makeup.

Pierce was also a pioneer in the makeup of classic werewolves, having given us Henry Hull’s memorable beast in the WEREWOLF OF LONDON (1935), as well as the iconic Larry Talbot’s alter ego in THE WOLF MAN (1941). He worked right up until his final years in the1960s.

The Westmore name was even more synonymous with make-up in Hollywood’s golden days, especially brothers  Bud and Wally Westmore. Usually, if there was some golden-age horror make-up that wasn’t by Pierce, chances are it was by one of the Westmores. But they didn’t just do horror movies. In fact, the Westmore name can be found in the credits of literally hundreds of movies of the 30s, 40s and 50s. Bud did the monster makeup for ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET FRANKENSTEIN (1948), while Wally Westmore cut his teeth doing the makeup for movies like the Frederic March version of DR. JEKYLL AND MR. HYDE (1931) and the  breath-taking classic,  ISLAND OF LOST SOULS (1932).

The strange creatures from THE MOLE PEOPLE, created by Bud Westmore.

There are lots of iconic images throughout the history of horror that are not as well known, but which are just as fresh in my mind after so many years of movie watching. Fascinating make-up creations like THE MOLE PEOPLE (1956) with makeup by Bud Westmore; the Morlocks in George Pal’s THE TIME MACHINE  from 1960 (makeup by William Tuttle ), the creatures from the Hammer films, especially THE REPTILE (1966), whose image (created by the great Roy Ashton) still stands out for me. In the science fiction cult classic THIS ISLAND EARTH, we were introduced to the Metaluna Mutant (created again by Bud Westmore), a throwaway character who was a sight to behold – I was always disappointed that he was never used again in other movies.

The creepy Morlocks from the original version of THE TIME MACHINE (1960).

Hammer great Roy Ashton's still scary makeup for THE REPTILE.

You might have seen the Metaluna Mutant on MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 when they laughed at the movie THIS ISLAND EARTH. But he's still cool as hell.

In the 60s and 70s, I (along with Michael Arruda and Mark Onspaugh) was captivated by the PLANET OF THE APES movies and their (at the time) cutting edge make-up effects, the work of the great John Chambers.

Their heirs have names like Dick Smith, Rick Baker and Tom Savini. All masters of their craft, who have impressed us with their creations over the years.

As for bad makeup, there is no shortage of that in the movies. Standouts include the wonderfully awful movie ZAAT from 1971 (also known as THE BLOOD WATERS OF DR. Z) – creature by Lee James O’Donnell; ZONTAR THE THING FROM VENUS by the legendarily horrible director Larry Buchanan; and just about anything Roger Corman did in 1950s, especially the laughably terrible monster from CREATURE FROM THE HAUNTED SEA (1961), designed by Beach Dickerson.

Run for your life! It's the monster known as ZAAT!

If this doesn't terrify you, nothing will. The monster from CREATURE FROM THE HAUNTED SEA!

© Copyright 2012 by L.L. Soares
“Monstrous Question” created by Michael Arruda

—END Part 4—

Monstrous Question: BEST HORROR MOVIE MAKE-UP (Part 3 of 4)

Posted in 2012, Frankenstein Movies, Horror Movie Makeup, Mark Onspaugh Columns, Monsters, Monstrous Question, Planet of the Apes with tags , , , , , , on April 14, 2012 by knifefighter

CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT:  MONSTROUS QUESTION
Question by Michael Arruda
Featuring Michael Arruda,Dan Keohane, Mark Onspaugh and L.L. Soares
Part 3 of 4

Today’s MONSTROUS QUESTION:  What are your picks for the most memorable makeup jobs in a horror/monster movie?

Our panel was asked to consider the following questions:

–What’s your pick for the best makeup job, that movie monster whose look is the best you’ve ever seen, perhaps your favorite.

–What’s your pick for the most over-the-top embarrassingly campy makeup job?  That monster you can’t help but laugh at?

–And last, simply the worst makeup job, meaning the most disappointing, that time when you looked at the monster and thought, that’s supposed to be scary?  That is the lamest looking monster I’ve ever seen!  The one that is so bad there’s nothing funny about it.

##

MARK ONSPAUGH responds:

Best makeup job of all time is Dick Smith’s awesome aging of Dustin Hoffman (then 33) to an 121-year old man in LITTLE BIG MAN (1970)—that old age makeup is still the gold standard. Smith did a huge number of appliances, including delicate EYELID appliances to complete the illusion. Unlike a monster, you can’t cover up a screw-up in a human face with an “I meant to do that” excuse… Just amazing.

Dick Smith aged Dustin Hoffman prematurely for LITTLE BIG MAN.

As for monsters, Jack Pierce’s concept and execution for the Frankenstein Monster in FRANKENSTEIN (1931) is a makeup that created an icon – other interpretations have come and gone (Hammer films, etc.), but the 1931 monster is probably the best known monster of all time—squared-off head, neck bolts—what kid hasn’t drawn him? He’s been in everything from comic books and bubblegum cards to movies, cartoons and plastic model kits. In the day, we called him “Frankenstein” or “Frankie”—to think that look was achieved in the days before foam rubber and silicone appliances is just breathtaking.

All the Universal monsters still rock—and the Creature from CREATURE OF THE BLACK LAGOON (1954) is another awesome design, though it’s more of a mask than an appliance makeup.

For puppets, Giger’s Xenomorph from ALIEN (1979) was something fresh, disturbing and different—how many bad movies ripped off that design in the 80’s? Too many to count. It was something out of nightmare, yet its disturbing anatomy made sense—a true landmark.

Lastly, though crude in some ways, I remember being riveted by the ape makeups in PLANET OF THE APES (1968)—these were a revelation and helped sell a fantastic-beyond-belief presence —no crude mask (at least for the principle actors), these designs allowed for emotion and “soulful” beasts. The product of John Chambers (who trained Tom Burman), the apes were followed up later by the animal men of THE ISLAND OF DR. MOREAU (1977)—forget the Brando version —the makeups in the earlier one are sublime.

John Chambers created the amazing look of the Apes from the PLANET OF THE APES movies of the 60s and 70s.

My picks for the most over-the-top embarrassingly campy make-up job include ROBOT MONSTER from 1953 (gorilla suit, space helmet), ATTACK OF THE GIANT LEECHES from 1959, ZONTAR THE THING FROM VENUS (1966), IT CHALLENGED THE WORLD (pickle monster!) and ATTACK OF THE THE (sic) EYE CREATURES (1965) all had horrible monsters – the Eye Creatures had visible zippers and some actors had black body suits and a mask—they tried in vain to hide behind bushes—no sale.

The bone-chilling horror that is ROBOT MONSTER!

One weird, disturbing makeup that actually made my roommate and I laugh was the movie FEAR NO EVIL (1981), a sort of CARRIE meets THE OMEN piece of crap-pie that featured the Son of Lucifer as a loser high school nerd… Until his powers start to kick in…At one point, he gives the abusive jock bully huge breasts, and the bully stabs himself to death in the shower… I imagine some people needed therapy after that scene.

The spooky Son of Lucifer himself from FEAR NO EVIL.

My biggest disappointment(s), I think, were in SWAMP THING (1982) —they should have taken a buff dude and just glued roots and such to him and painted him so he’d look like the Bernie Wrightson creation from the comics – instead, they went with a full rubber suit, which was cumbersome and made Swampy look like he had been patronizing a bayou Krispy Kreme Donuts every stinkin’ day… And the Arcane Monster from that film is just ridiculously bad—not scary, not awesome, just silly.

His secret is out. Is SWAMP THING addicted to Krispy Kreme?

Another makeup that was both bad and cool is the puppet heads for BEAST WITHIN (1982) —my first wife turned away in disgust, but I was delighted as the kid’s head inflated to the size of a basketball – it’s crude and laughable, yet oddly compelling… I think I have to go rent that.

© Copyright 2012 by Mark Onspaugh
“Monstrous Question” created by Michael Arruda

—END Part 3—-

Monstrous Question: BEST HORROR MOVIE MAKE-UP (Part 2 of 4)

Posted in Daniel Keohane Reviews, Horror Movie Makeup, Monsters, Monstrous Question, Werewolf Movies with tags , , , , on April 7, 2012 by knifefighter

CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT:  MONSTROUS QUESTION
Question by Michael Arruda
Featuring Michael Arruda,Dan Keohane, Mark Onspaugh and L.L. Soares
Part 2 of 4

Today’s MONSTROUS QUESTION:  What are your picks for the most memorable makeup jobs in a horror/monster movie?

Our panel was asked to consider the following questions:

–What’s your pick for the best makeup job, that movie monster whose look is the best you’ve ever seen, perhaps your favorite.

–What’s your pick for the most over-the-top embarrassingly campy makeup job?  That monster you can’t help but laugh at?

–And last, simply the worst makeup job, meaning the most disappointing, that time when you looked at the monster and thought, that’s supposed to be scary?  That is the lamest looking monster I’ve ever seen!  The one that is so bad there’s nothing funny about it.

##

DAN KEOHANE responds:

For best makeup jobs, or at least most memorable, first off I’d have to say AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON (1981), both for it’s uber-cool transformation scenes, which were the first of its kind (and without CGI), and the creepiest werewolf still to ever hit a screen.

Rick Baker created the wonderful makeup effects for AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON.

Also, I should add INK (2009), which had some very memorable makeup and costumes.

Off the top of my head, I can’t think of the worst makeup effects, but by far, the lamest monster that ever hit the big screen (and how it ever hit said screen is beyond me) is from THE CREEPING TERROR (1964)—someone in an oversized piñata who shambles up to people and waits for them to crawl into its mouth.

What exactly IS the monster from THE CREEPING TERROR?

© Copyright 2012 by Daniel G. Keohane.
“Monstrous Question” created by Michael Arruda

—END Part 2—

Monstrous Question: BEST HORROR MOVIE MAKE-UP (Part 1 of 4)

Posted in 2012, Christopher Lee films, Frankenstein Movies, Hammer Films, Horror Movie Makeup, Michael Arruda Reviews, Monsters, Monstrous Question, Planet of the Apes with tags , , , , , on April 6, 2012 by knifefighter

CINEMA KNIFE FIGHT:  MONSTROUS QUESTION
Question by Michael Arruda
Featuring Michael Arruda, Dan Keohane, Mark Onspaugh and L.L. Soares
Part 1 of 4

Today’s MONSTROUS QUESTION:  What are your picks for the most memorable makeup jobs in a horror/monster movie?

Our panel was asked to consider the following questions:

–What’s your pick for the best makeup job, that movie monster whose look is the best you’ve ever seen, perhaps your favorite.

–What’s your pick for the most over-the-top embarrassingly campy makeup job?  That monster you can’t help but laugh at?

–And last, simply the worst makeup job, meaning the most disappointing, that time when you looked at the monster and thought, that’s supposed to be scary?  That is the lamest looking monster I’ve ever seen!  The one that is so bad there’s nothing funny about it.

Our panel responds:

##

Up first, it’s MICHAEL ARRUDA:

When I think of monster makeup, I can’t help but think of the classic monster movies from yesteryear.  They’ve always been my favorites and still are today, so most of my choices come from the era of classic horror.

I’m also a big fan of FRANKENSTEIN movies, and a lot of my picks are from FRANKENSTEIN films.

Jack Pierce did the iconic makeup for 1931's FRANKENSTEIN.

For example, two of my favorites are obvious choices, Boris Karloff as the Monster in FRANKENSTEIN (1931), makeup by Jack Pierce, and Christopher Lee as the Creature in THE CURSE OF FRANKENSTEIN (1957), makeup by Phil Leaky.

Then there’s Karloff again, as Im-Ho-Tep THE MUMMY (1932), makeup by Jack Pierce.

I love Lon Chaney Sr. as THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA (1925), makeup by Lon Chaney Sr.

The most underrated for me is Christopher Lee in HORROR OF DRACULA (1958), makeup by Phil Leaky.  There’s something very natural and frightening about Lee’s look as Dracula in this movie.  Later on in the Hammer Dracula sequels, he would be made up more heavily, with his flesh looking paler, almost white, and often he’d be photographed with green light aimed at him, and he’d have deep red bloodshot eyes.  But a lot of these effects came off as over-the-top.  There’s none of this present in HORROR OF DRACULA.  When I think of the most frightening Dracula ever, I think of Lee as Dracula in HORROR OF DRACULA, and a lot of this is because of the way he looked.  Very scary.

Christopher Lee as the Prince of Darkness in THE HORROR OF DRACULA (makeup by Phil Leaky).

Speaking of scary, I think the scariest makeup job ever is Linda Blair in THE EXORCIST (1973), make-up by Dick Smith.

But my favorite monster movie makeup probably belongs to Lon Chaney Jr. as THE WOLF MAN, and of Chaney’s many performances in this classic role, my favorite makeup job on Chaney as the Wolf Man is in FRANKENSTEIN MEETS THE WOLF MAN (1943), makeup by Jack Pierce.

And my favorite of all time?  It’s not from a classic horror movie, but from a science fiction movie, and that would be PLANET OF THE APES (1968), makeup by John Chambers and a bunch of other people.  I’m still wowed and impressed by the ape makeup in that movie, as well as in the entire series.

My choice for the best of the campy make-up jobs would be the monster in I WAS A TEENAGE FRANKENSTEIN (1957) makeup by Phillip Scheer.

The worst ever?  The Frankenstein monster in  DRACULA VS. FRANKENSTEIN (1971), makeup by Gary Kent.  It’s the ugliest Frankenstein monster ever, and sadly, the most laughable.

And my choice for the most disappointing make-up job belongs to Hammer’s THE GORGON (1964), makeup by the usually reliable Roy Ashton.  It’s a really cool movie, and stars Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee, and it’s directed by Terence Fisher, but when you finally see the Gorgon at the end, it’s horribly fake looking  Couldn’t they have found someone who didn’t mind having real snakes around her head, instead of the fak- looking rubber snakes which didn’t even move?  One of the few times Hammer embarrassed themselves in terms of the monsters they created.

A possible misstep from the great Roy Ashton from THE GORGON.

© Copyright 2012 by Michael Arruda

—END Part 1—